Unlimited Trips to the Fixins Bar

While I was in Texas this last weekend, I was looking around the Sabine River and enjoying the scenery and on more than one occasion I said a little prayer in my heart thanking my Heavenly Father for creating such a beautiful place. I would also from time to time look into other boats that would pass us on the water and see fathers and sons (or daughters or grandchildren) fishing as well. What struck me about these other anglers was the memories some of these parents are building for their children. Most of the adults looked like the time spent with these children was more important than catching fish, that there was something more at stake while they were on the water.

In my studies of good Bar-B Que, I have discovered that there are four basic types broken down by geographical location. There is Carolina BBQ which concentrates on pulled pork or chicken and utilizes a vinegar based sauce for basting and as a finishing sauce. Then there’s Memphis style which is very much rib oriented. There’s Kansas City BBQ which focuses on the sauce itself, (this is where the KC in “KC Masterpiece” comes from). And of course there’s Texas BBQ which is primarily beef. Being from Texas, this is by far my favorite, both to eat and cook for others.

One thing I really like about many of the BBQ joints in Texas is the “Fixins Bar.” When Sheri and I went out for BBQ in Virginia, there were very few places that served what I call Texas BBQ, and none of those places had a fixins bar. What is a fixins bar? Well, it is much like a salad bar where you would pick out your favorite salad items, but instead of lettuce and tomatoes (although a good fixins bar will have these too), a fixins bar had things like wheat and white bread slices, sliced onions, sliced pickles, pickle spears, some jalapenos – whole or sliced, extra sauce for your meat, maybe some fries or onion rings, cole slaw, potato salad, baked beans, macaroni salad, etc… you get the point. Anything to make your BBQ experience more complete and full.

I’ve always liked the idea of the fixins bar and the BBQ restaurants I seemed to enjoy the best were the ones that offered unlimited trips to the fixins bar. It just made the meal that much better, in my opinion.

I think about my life like that sometimes. The basic life sustaining ingredients are there… food, drink, sleep, breath, etc… but isn’t life supposed to be more than just living? The things in life that makes it so much better can be likened to the fixins bar, don’t you think?

Here’s what I mean. I love to fly airplanes. I was taking lessons a few years ago and was just about to take my solo flight when I was rear-ended while stopped at a stop sign in Richmond and hurt my back. My doctor told me not to fly for a few weeks and when I got to feeling better it just never happened. I didn’t go back and pick up where I left off. Other things started taking up my time and I can see my flight bag from where I’m sitting right now and I wonder “Why didn’t I go back to the fixins bar?”

That was a small missed opportunity though… not really a huge deal to me anymore. Someday I might venture out to the local airport here and take up where I left off. I still want to make that solo flight. The real tragedy to me are the missed trips to the fixins bar that stop us from progressing or keep us from experiencing life the way we are supposed to. “Adam fell that men might be; and men are that they might have joy.” We have been given this great blessing for us to enjoy, and if we don’t use it, we’ll lose it.

I see people all the time that just don’t have a clue how to be happy. All they can see in their lives are misery and pain because they’ve learned how to look for those things, and ignore all the wonderful things that are around them. They complain and mope and are convinced that they have contracted every disease and mental condition known to medical science, and they are also very proficient at blaming anyone and everyone else for their troubles. And then they sit around wasting away and wondering “Why did I get dealt this hand?” It may seem callous of me to answer “You weren’t… you dealt the hand to yourself.” It may appear that I’m uncaring or heartless when I don’t want to be around people like that. I say get yourselves to the fixins bar and make your life the way you want it. That’s what it’s there for. I'll even help if you want.

And attitude of gratitude is the key, I think. Being grateful for the things I have and the abilities I have and the challenges in life that ultimately make me stronger is how I enjoy life. I like to live with passion and to be passionate about what I do and how I do it.

While we were fishing, my brother-in-law Sam told us a story about his grandfather taking him fishing. They would fish and when grandpa hooked a fish, he would do nothing... just leave the fish on the hook in the water, and wait. He would wait until Sam needed to do something, maybe change bait, get a drink, anything that would give grandpa a chance to say "Here then, you hold my pole and I'll talk care of..." whatever it was that needed attention. Then Sam would feel a tug on the line and reel in the fish that grandpa had hooked. Sam would be so proud and grandpa would make such a fuss about the fish and both were happy. It wasn't until Sam was grown I think that he discovered what grandpa had done.

I think Sam's grandfather understood the meaning and importance of the fixins bar. Hearing Sam tell that story and how happy he was with his grandpa for doing that more than made up for the fact that I didn't catch any fish this time. The story itself was fixins.

I could eat BBQ without a single trip to the fixins bar and I could go through life without passion for anything, but life (like BBQ) is so much better when you include the little things that add that little something. We have unlimited trips available to us, if we'll only go. Minor investment, but huge rewards.

Until next time…